I have found them at last
There is an Apostrophe Protection Society in the world. They even have pages of photos of actual apostrophe abuse. (Note: The images are graphic and may be disturbing to some readers, at least those who care about grammar.)
The particular abuse that annoys me the most right now is the one on the box of hair clippers I picked up at a church rummage sale a few months ago. The cover shows a young boy in a bowl-cut with the chirrupy title in large letters of "Getta' Haircut!!" (The quotation and exclamation marks are on the box.)
Every time I look at it, I am filled with questions. Who are they quoting? Why do they have an apostrophe when no letters are missing? What are they exclaiming over? Why did they need to come up with a name--what was wrong with plainly labeling it "Hair Clippers?" How does one use hair clippers to do a bowl cut, and why would anyone want to?
It's almost enough to make me regret buying the clippers. Maybe I should glue something over the cover. (I have to look at it fairly often, as DOB gets it out every week to trim his goatee. And he claims he can't figure out how to get the cord back in the box, so it doesn't get put away until I do it.)