Friday, August 16, 2013

Dear Grandchildren,

I'm not saving stuff for you.

Maybe by the time you come along we will have progressed to the point where all toys are holographic projections and cleanup consists of hitting the off switch. (Wow. THAT is a fantasy.)

Or maybe we will have regressed to the point where all you have to play with is sticks and dirt. (Oh, wait, that's what your parents are playing with.)

Or maybe things will be pretty much the same, in which case, there will be yard sales.

Or maybe your parents will stay true to their preadolescent forswearing of reproduction. In which case, they won't be your parents.

Whatever it is, we can get along without me saving things.

I didn't actually get rid of the blocks yet. Those inch cubes are pretty handy for teaching volume, so I can justify them through at least third grade.

By the time you come along, the colors that looks so cute now will be ghastly. The toys that are educational will be passe. The river will move on.

I may as well let it sweep some of this stuff away with it. Let somebody else enjoy it before it expires completely.

Of course, nobody will let me get rid of the Duplos yet, even though they have long since officially graduated to Legos. 

Or just let it go to the landfill. My time is not worth sorting out the cards from dollar store games of Old Maid, from cardboard puzzles that are warped and missing half their pieces. Some things even the poor don't want. And I need the space.

You want your grandmother to reach her old age with her sanity intact, don't you?

So . . . don't complain. When you come along, maybe we'll go to the park. Or the library, where they have librarians to make sure the pieces go back with the right puzzles. Or switch on the toybox holograph.

I may have to hang on to the elf hat. Your daddy was just too stinkin' cute in it. And it doesn't take up space. Much.


Phyllis said...

Yes! Especially here, the older generation saved everything. Now their children don't want it. Most of them try to give it to us instead. :-P

Diary of an Autodidact said...

You forgot the real reason for not saving it: so you get the fun of shopping for it all over again for the grandkids. Except that then it will be mixed with the vindictive satisfaction of using your grandparently gifting powers to force your kids to pick up toys that they never would as a child. Bwahahahaha!

Not Lucy said...

I did save things for the grandkids and it is very fun to watch them play with the same toys their mom played with and their grandmother and great-aunt and great-uncles. A lot of the 'old' stuff is amongst the favorite toys in their room. Of course, I do have a pretty big and accessible attic to store the stuff.

kelly said...

Oh my goodness, this is so funny! I want to print it out and save it with the few things I actually hold on to and can recall where they are at any given moment (that would only be birth certificates, passports and photos)so someday my grandchildren might stand a chance of "discovering" it! I love your humor.